My Antonia has a large emphasis on the past. Both Jim and Antonia seem to value their past very highly and almost "live" in their past rather than the present. Antonia seems to more accept and recognize that that is what has happened and that is how she feels, whereas Jim seems to be pretending and not totally recognize that he has idolized the past.
When Jim finds out that Antonia has a child but is not married, the author writes (in Jim's voice),
"I tried to shut Antonia out of my mind. I was bitterly disappointed in her. I could not forgive her for becoming an object of pity." He is disappointed that Antonia did not turn out to be the girl he had pictured. Because he had spent so many years idolizing her, when she did something out of the ordinary, he was angered.
Towards the end of the text when Antonia and Jim reunite, they both seem to dissolve the barriers of pretending that they are still in the past, and just enjoy remembering and reminiscing with one another. I think that even though Jim sees that he won't always get to be with Antonia, he gets to have the memories of his past with her, and to him, that is enough.
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